I mean, when their parents die, if a child dies, if you suddenly have to move, or you lose all your money, or you make a lot of money, you’re going to learn a whole lot of new things about somebody.
And also in that relationship in order to actually be good parents, right? Fisher: That’s exactly — and that’s one of the reasons I say to people, “Don’t marry him or her until some of that intensity has worn off.” Ms. And of course, if it’s in a good relationship, you keep learning things about them 30 years later. And even if it’s the same person, that the marriage has to become something new at a different stage in life.
Fisher: And so — but it gives us great opportunities to build the kinds of partnerships that we really want. Tippett: And that’s a shift that you’re seeing now demographically. More and more people are having children before they marry. And, most people know about disease, and so that — they should be able to monitor that. And, I’m really excited about it because it’s groups of friends. They don’t know these people they way they know the people they hang around with in New York City. You go out with a group of friends and then somehow people are coupled.
These one-night-stands, the friends with benefits, the living together before you getting married. But you’re saying that that’s not necessarily about them being flaky or casual. Now, I mean, most people know all about contraception, so that worry is no — should no longer be with us. We’re seeing a new form called — that I call the association. Because they go home to families that they really don’t know very well, and who don’t really know them. Tippett: I wonder if you’ve also paid any attention to something I’m aware of as a parent of teenaged children, and I hear a lot of people talking about it, is that even this romance piece seems to happen collectively in groups. You don’t invite the girl to go to a movie and dinner. But if you casually go out with a group, and you go dancing, and then you all end up having breakfast at 2 a.m.
Now, whether there’s more disarray than there ever has been, who knows? And I know you also like to work with literature and poetry. It is a distortion of reality so remarkable that it should, by rights, enable most of us to understand the other forms of lunacy with the sympathy of fellow-sufferers.” Ms. Tippett: “And yet, as we all know, it is a madness that, however ferocious, seldom, if ever, lasts… Fisher: And I’m between men, so that’s a real challenge. There’s a couple men in that group that I could be interested in, but nobody’s expressed anything. And they’re the ones that will come to the hospital if I’m sick. So I have a group of friends who I see, and I see them regularly.
And I’ve always been interested in why we’re all alike as opposed to why we’re all different. Tippett: I mean, obviously, marriage and divorce has been in flux.